Taking The 'Caddy To Mountain Time. Part.4

Please Don't Look At Me Like That!

          After the 'introductions' were now out of the way, although it must be said, in a way that Bill had never experienced before, they began to walk together, naturally Jim followed, sniffing at and pissing on whatever the desert had to offer.  Bill soon started to notice that Pam was not quite as tough as she would like you to believe, confident yes, loud, brash even, but having a big mouth does not necessarily mask the person who owns it! Perhaps Bill was far too cynical for his own good, perhaps he tended to overcook the stew, delve too deep beneath the surface of a person or  place even a situation, of course he was aware of this shortcoming of his, even so, he still seemed to have this inner ability to always see just that little bit deeper into the person and he was convinced that Pam was just another one of those people who was in search of themselves, like him. Bill thought he might as well start the conversation even though he reckoned that Pam would think it more like a line of questioning,

          "So what are you all the way out here for? holiday, sorry,  I mean vacation, look, I'm a 'Brit and you're  are a Yank, a different word but the same meaning", Bill had soon decided to turn the tables and become the question master,

           " I've told you, I'm just chasing after Jim, he knows where we are going for some reason, Christ knows why but he is my dog and as much as it is a pain in my arse, for some reason, I've got to follow him"! During this explanation, the pair had stopped walking and Jim who was at their feet on his back busily rolling in something disgusting, seemed to realise that he was the topic of conversation, he stopped rolling and began to stretch himself out, as he did he farted and quickly got to his feet, began to look around, hoping that nobody realised it came from him! Trying her best not to laugh at him, Pam proceeded to scold the dog,

            "Jim you are such a tart, no point in looking so innocent, we heard you, probably the county too, probably the fucking State!" Jim moved away from them, tail and ears down, then he disappeared from view behind the next pile of boulders partially covered with bushes of some kind, presumably to relieve himself, Bill looked across to Pam, she looked back then raised her eyebrows,

           " What do we expect, he is a fucking animal after all, no manners, no scruples, just a dog"! Bill smiled, he was really beginning to like Jim, he amused him, so much so, he wished that he was a dog like Jim and most importantly, to Bill anyway, a dog who is liked, who is considered a friend, someone who people are always glad to be with, someone who people are always glad to see coming! Bill smiled to himself and with one of those 'if only' looks, one of those looks that is a mixture of sadness and of hope, he raised his eyebrows, then slowly moved his head left to right as though he were shaking the very notion out of his head, making room no doubt for the next onslaught to his senses. 

            They both carried on walking and Pam tugged playfully at the rucksack on Bill's back,

            "What you got in there then, is that where you keep your stash?" Bill grinned at the question and turned to her,

           "Just a few 'essentials', things that may come in handy, matches, a torch, some water, some spare socks and... well, you lot call them shorts but we call them pants", he stalled with his explanation, " why do you want to know anyway, it's all pretty normal, pretty boring really, as I said, essentials", she began to giggle and then burst out laughing, this in turn made Bill feel slightly uncomfortable, he turned away and began looking ahead,

           "Ok,ok, i'm sorry, I did not mean to embarrass you, I was just being nosy that's all, i'm sorry, of course it's your bag, your stuff and your reasons, i'll change the subject, Bill stopped and turned to face her again,

            "I'm not embarrassed, not me, why should I be, no way, I'm fine with it", Bill seemed quite indignant and appeared to be getting a little hot under the collar, Pam looked across to him, then she reached forward and took hold of both of his hands,

            " Bill that's ok, perhaps I did overstep the mark, you are no different to any other man I have met", this comment from Pam made Bill feel even more uncomfortable,

            "What is that supposed to mean, like any other man? what is that all about, Christ you have started something now, what the hell do you mean?" Smiling and pulling herself closer to him, she stared straight into his eyes and whispered,

           " You are all fucking liars!" with that, she leaned in to him, kissed him and removing her hands from his, she sharply smacked his arse,

           "Come on drifter, let's just keep on walking shall we", Bill began to smile down at her and slowly started to think to himself, what was it about this woman, he just could not fathom out, why could he not quite get the connection, this thought did not scare him or alarm him, far from it, he had such a strong feeling that he knew her, that they had even met once before somewhere, Christ knows where, in his head most probably, but he was equally confused as to what it was about him that she obviously liked, if in fact there was such a thing, or was he just wishful thinking, there was just so much going on right now?
            They had walked for what seemed like miles, they had been enjoying each others company, talking deeply at times, then chatting at others, both smiling and laughing, oblivious to the Sun above them, high in the sky all the time creating beautiful shadows all around them, it seemed like the whole place, the desert, was just so clear, so sharp, the whole place was just .....so alive, Bill was feeling the same, he was so happy, his whole body tingled, was this part of what he had been craving for so long? Occasionally they would stop, laughing at some comment or other and all the time he was intriguing her and she was enchanting him and all around them the sunlight danced across the desert panorama, at one minute creating such a primeval scene, it took his breath away, the next would be scenes of such mystery, they felt like a punch to his chest, then before their very eyes would unveil a scene of such beauty, they would simply sooth away at his sences. Bill was by now beginning to feel such an overwhelming wave of peace and happiness, what more was there to ask, walking in the desert with a beautiful woman, a friendly dog, a dog that felt the need to leave his mark everywhere that he sniffed, Jim  was busily pissing on every cactus, every plant and bush, every single clump of rock that he passed, Christ how much urine does that dog possess thought Bill with a smile, he liked Jim!
        "I think that may be your ride  a little way ahead, this must be where we part company", said Pam holding her hand above her eyes to screen her view from the sun, for just ahead of them the big black 'Caddy appeared at the side of the desert road and now the nearer that they got to it they could hear a voice calling out, echoing in the stillness of the desert, it was Mr Young,
       As they got nearer to the 'Caddy, the voice became clearer, it was indeed Mr Young,
       "Amigo, hey Billy Boy, how you doing"? Although he was not looking directly at the two, he had a clear view of them from the rear view mirror, he had by now slid across the huge bench seat to get a look at them, and out of the window, as he called, his arm with that distinctive plaid workshirt sleeve covering it, was waving lazily at them, leaving no doubt as to who it was! The 'Caddy looked particularly out of place now, more than it had before, Bill thought more than ever how much a big black shiny Hearse, especially a Cadillac, did not belong in such a landscape as this, very elegant, but so not quite right!  As the two now approached the 'Caddy, the driver's door opened with a deep clunk from the handle, this  made Bill smile, there were no rattles, no loose trim, this was a rock solid piece of Americana from a bygone age. 
        "Hello again, you thought that I had gone, but hey, I'm back Billy Boy, just like the proverbial bad penny",  Mr Young stopped, obviously deep in thought....."You know what, that has given me a great idea for a song!" Bill smiled and raised his eyebrows, the way you do when you hear the same story again and again. Mr Young appeared from inside the Hearse and was stretching himself in front of them, his six foot plus frame sending out a cloud of dust skyward, he smelt like he had been asleep in the 'Caddy for a few hours, the pungent smell of armpits hit Bill and Pam's nostrils, 
        "No you are not like a bad penny, more like an old friend", said Bill, Pam slowly turned to face Bill and whispered out of the side of her mouth as she did,
        "I think the expression you are looking for is 'like an unflushed turd", this made Bill smile, bravely he stopped himself from giggling, Pam continued as she turned back to Mr Young,
         "Hi Neil, long time no see, how are you?" Mr Young looked at her, he was almost looking her up and down, not in a creepy way, more like the way usually reserved for a parent looking at their child at the School gate, checking the uniform is just right, making sure the lunch-box is present, 
        "Hello Pammy, mmm, I reckon you will do, now, where the hell is that damn mutt of yours, I've got something for him", he was busy looking around when suddenly he spotted Jim emerging from behind a bush and as he in turn spotted Mr Young, he began to run excitedly towards him!
        "Hey Jimmy Boy you old Bastard, come see what old Neil has got you", then he began to reach into a K-Mart carrier bag, purposely rustling it to deliver maximum effect, until finally he pulled out ....a pair of sunglasses? Pam looked at the glasses then back to Mr Young,
        "He's a fucking dog in case you hadn't noticed, I don't think he needs a pair of Aviators!" Pam giggled and flung out her arms in disbelief,
       "Just because he's a dog don't mean the sun don't bother him, 'ain't that right boy", he said as Jim was jumping up and down licking his face, obviously so pleased to see his old friend,
        "These are special shades made special.....for dogs", he held them out for Pam and Bill to get a better look, the glasses had an elastic strap arrangement, similar to a muzzle, the two arms seemed to be more curved and were designed to go under the dog's neck, so true enough, these were indeed sunglasses for dogs! A few minutes later he managed to calm Jim down, he got him to sit at his feet and he placed the glasses around the dog's neck and secure the two pieces of Velcro, he then stepped back to take a look,
         "what do you think", said Mr Young,
         "I'll have to get back to you on that", said a very bemused Bill,
        "I was talking to the fucking dog", said Mr Young adjusting the strap!, All of a sudden Jim changed from being a crazy, lazy old dog, his whole demeanor altered, he began strutting around the  place, in a split second he had become one very cool looking dog,
       "Jimmy Jazz, you are now a bona-fide, rootin' tootin' hot dog", Mr Young said clapping his hands which caused Jim to howl his obvious pleasure, he then began to strut over towards Bill and Pam, barking as he went, this was a very pleased dog, Pam was not quite so enraptured,
       "for Christ's sake, when you have quite finished, yes you look good, weird but good, ok you do look cool but when you are quite finished prancing and parading like some old river boat Queen, I would like to get going, just saying", and almost as if Jim nodded in agreement with her followed by a very loud bark, a bark that said, let's do it, I'm good to go, Bill then turned his attention to Mr Young once again,
        "If it's ok with you, I'd like to carry on walking too, I have got company now with Pam and Jim, so I suppose you could say I'm up for it", Mr Young looked up at him then turned and faced the 'Caddy,
        "What do you reckon Amigo, do you think he is made of the 'right Stuff'?", Bill looked up confused, who was Mr Young talking to, who was in the back of the 'Caddy, hidden from view behind the tinted side windows, he looked over to Pam, she obviously knew who was in there, she began smiling and called to Jim,
"Hey you little bastard, your drinking buddy is here, go and say hello, you baby boomers have got to stick together, poor old Bill is just a Generation X'r, he's got some catching up to do"!  With that, Jim seemed to prick his ears up, he sniffed the air and let out an excited bark and vaulted towards the Hearse skidding to a dusty halt at the driver's door, he stood barking into the 'Caddy, he raised and lowered his twitching body, his tail wagging ten to the dozen, whoever it was, Jim was so pleased to see them!  It seemed that Bill was the only one in the group who had no clue and he felt very left out as he watched Jim disappear inside the Hearse and then hearing him barking with obvious pleasure, the dog soon reappeared, turned and standing as tall and erect as he could, he let out a loud howl,
          " Good to see you my friend, really good", Bill recognised the voice but could not put a face to it, he waited for it to continue,
         "You make sure you look after Bill you hear, he wants to find himself out here somewhere, pretty much like we did, so you keep an eye out for him, I'll see you soon at the cabin on the hill, you know the one, the one that looks out over Laurel and over to Los Cochinos, Jim barked almost in agreement, suddenly Bill realised who the voice belonged to, it was Gram, the guy from the train right at the beginning of this crazy trip! Where did he come from? the last time he saw him he was headed for..... who knows where, just riding the rails as far as Bill was concerned,
         "Hey Gram, it's me, Bill, you remember, the guy from the washroom on the train, Bill the British guy, you must remember?" Just as soon as the words left his mouth Bill knew that they were the wrong ones, they must have sounded so wrong ,so not the right ones, Bill stood there thinking to himself, 
      "Christ what the Hell does everyone think now, I must sound like some crazy queer who travels trains to have brief encounters of a carnal kind with strange men!", not that Bill was particularly homophobic, each to their own was his motto but this needed some kind of clarification he was thinking!  Pam could see how mortified Bill was now feeling and seized the moment and leapt into the conversation,
         "It's ok Bill, you are amongst friends, your secret is completely safe with us", Bill was trying his best to curb his crushing embarrassment,
         " Thank Christ for that, hey! what do you mean,  secret, there is no secret, holy fuck, I'm a guy guy, one hundred percent hetero, it just came out wrong that's all, so.....fucking wrong"! Not for the first time, Pam was beginning to laugh at Bill's expense, as she began to walk over to him and with both hands, grabbed the cheeks of his butt and squeezed hard then she looked up and stared into his eyes, she purred,
          "That's ok Bill, if I was a guy, I would certainly entertain you in the washroom, you are kind of cute", she ended by biting his bottom lip before moving up to plant a kiss on his mouth! By now Bill had realized that she was teasing him, probably about the same time as Mr Young burst out laughing,
          "Ok you have all had your fun....again, but to get one thing straight, I am not 'cute', I'm a Brit, we don't do 'cute' "he said with a wry grin,
          "...and I would very much appreciate it if you would not look at me like that, Pam stepped back and gave him a very exaggerated salute,
          " anything you say.....SIR!" then she bowed her head, stepped back a pace or two and began staring at her feet, beginning to make a circular pattern in the dirt,
          "I was only saying, no offence was meant I can assure you", Bill put a finger under her chin and slowly lifted it to look at him,
          "Saying what exactly", he quietly said to her as she began to smile back at him then suddenly,  she shouted,
          "that you are CUTE, ok, for a Goddamn stuffed shirt Limey, you are cute, live with it, just ask Jim here", Bill knew that he was no match for this lot, looked down at Jim who by this time was sat in front of Bill, bolt upright and looking very handsome in his glasses, he noticed that he was also wearing a scarf around his neck, a scarf with a rather fetching Paisley pattern, Bill bent down to ruffle the dog's head, then he noticed upon closer scrutiny, it wasn't a Paisley design, it was an assortment of.... skulls, many skulls of different sizes and all were, or at least appeared to be, smiling at him!  Bill leaned back and while still stroking Bill's head, grinning he softly spoke to the dog,
          "My God Jim, I bet you are going to light some fires during your lifetime", Jim looked up at him and moved his head slowly up and down, Bill was a little puzzled and began wondering to himself, was this dog...agreeing with him? Then Jim began to give Bill a friendly growl, the dog was, agreeing with him!